Woodside Warriors Cricket Club

Where even the blind, morbidly obese people with no arms can play

2008 Quotes

Kunz - 'There's nothing more embarrassing than losing to a mickey mouse team'
Tom - 'They don't look mickey mouse, they look pretty good to me'
Kunz - 'I was talking about us'

Kenny on Jim's fielding 'Panzer-like Jim'

Jim on Paxy "What is it with gingers and incompetence?"

Jim and Jacko on practicing 'If you practice your gay, a practicing homosexual if you will'.

Paxy on scoring 'Nice shot, but its not going on his f@£king averages'

Kunz overheard on phone 'What about cricket practice on tuesday?'

Jaxy finally comes out ,"OOOhh there's nettles!!!!"

Kunz "Women are always in charge", Jim "try saying that in Austria"

Dovener "Tom you must be the most improved player"

2007

"Kenny gave me his body for one ball" - Kunz

"If we don't lose wickets, we'll win this" - Tom

"il pleut!"("it rains") - Jimbob's helpful advice to being out.

"I'll run him out" - Jaxy promising to run Tom out shortly before he does.

"Your not fit to wear the shirt" - Gangas tries to encourage Jaxy to stop nurdling

"Ooh the ball's hard" - Jim writes Denso's motto after fielding lapses.

"Your so f**king gay I can't take you seriously anymore", Jacko inspires part timer Ricky T.

"That's Bitch Mist", Jacko offers a critique on Tom's toiletries.

"What are these cricket undies like?"
"Mine are a bit like your undies but with a bigger package." Jim dispenses advice on cricketing attire.

"So let me get this right, gingers can't catch, baldies can" - Jim Surmises the fielding options

"Put it down as four singles" - Baines amazes himself and gets a four.

"I've always suspected you bat for both sides" - Baines welcomes Kunz to crease playing for St. Marks.

"I enjoy batting for the other side", Kunz

"Use the bat Tom" Sue offers batting advice to Tom
" 'I'll give you the strike' " Jim to Paxy shortly before Jim hits 22 in one over.

"The decent ginger one", Jim describes Paxy.

"Baines works out averages, Tom is officially useless" - Jim

"It's a known fact that only ginger men can lead" - Kunz

"Kunz's only had a decent knock he was angryr that he was the only numpty gullible enough to pay £3 for parking." - Ste